To make a long story short, I'm a 24 year old male and I've never even been on a single date. I can't seem to get girls to like me in that way. The running joke in my family is that I'll never get married and my sister always jokes that I didn't "really" go to college since I had absolutely no social life during those years.

1. I suspected the reason for my misfortune was that I was ugly. I've had a few male "friends" (I don't really like them) tell me that I look "scary" and that they'd be scared of me if we were not buddies. I'm definitely not fat, so it isn't that… I'm 6ft, ~180lbs and I have a fairly athletic build. I used to work out a lot and I played sports in highschool. So if it isn't my body, it must be my face, right? So I tried placing photos of myself on hotornot.com. I was surpsied that the ratings for my two photos were 8.7 and 9.2. The most frequent ratings in each score distribution was 7 and 8 respectively.
2. Post your picture! it's hard for anyone to answer this if we don't know what you look like. And I don't have IM.
3. Dude it's not your looks, it's your personality, or a combination of the two. Something about you resonates "don't date me." Try antidepressants (like Lexapro) and a makeover. No I'm not kidding. Write back here in 4 months and tell us how you're doing.
4. I don't think looks really have alot to do with it. I think it's your extremely low self-esteem. You should have more confidence in yourself. Girls pick up on that. If you don't think you're worth much, why should they? Go to Church or singles dances or join a club to meet girls. All girls don't care about what's on the outside.( the mature ones, anyway) It's how you treat yourself, and others that really counts.
5. pleez post a picture of urself then maybe we can help
6. Ok, so I looked at some of your other posts as well, and here is my honest opinion of why you are having no luck with eharmony. I don't even need to see your picture, or know how you were rated on some shallow website, it's pretty clear.

   You said in another similar post: "I'm finding that on eHarmony I'm getting a lot of women contacting me that are borderline cute. They aren't ugly, and they might be a lot cuter in person, but they aren't the type of girls any of my guy friends would classify as "cute". I also got a few fat girls to contact me….But every time I contact a "cute" girl, she usually either doesn't respond or rejects me…Do they think they can get better or that I'm ugly?"

   Your problem is not what you look like, it is this attitude. First of all, from what you said, you seem superficial and kinda hypocritical (and if that's how you are, I'm guessing there's at least a hint of it in your profile) - you are really insecure about your looks (enough to post this same question like 2 dozen times!), yet you take women that DO contact you at the same face value that you do not want to be judged by. double edged sword? Second, what your friends think is cute doesn't mean a damn thing. Everyone has different tastes, and there is someone out there for everyone - you need to decide what it is you (not your buddies) like in a woman, beyond the superficial, before you'll ever find it and have a successful relationship. It sounds like you are too focused on what people look like - yourself and others. Of course, a basic attraction is important - but it's not everything, it's just a starting point. You may be overlooking some 'borderline girls' who are actually extraordinary if you bothered to know them beyond a mediocre online picture that leads you to delete them. it's not that nobody is responding - it's just that you get rejected by the ones you think you want. Maybe you need to re-evaluate what you want. You've never been on a date in your life at age 24 and you want someone to take a chance on you - why not take a chance on them? You want a relationship with a *person*, not just a body, right?

   Also, feeling good about yourself and who you are will make you more attractive to other people. Women like confidence, someone who knows (and likes) who they are and what they want. If you aren't comfortable in your own skin, others won't be comfortable with you either. I can tell you as a woman who has dated many men that figuring this part out will get you very far, even if you aren't a "10".

   I think maybe one of the big reasons you are insecure about yourself is that you've never been with a woman, so my advice would be - get out there and date some, even if they are 'borderline'…go on lots of dates. Just start somewhere. Each girl you date (even just going on a first date and no more) will teach you a little more about what you like and don't like. And most importantly, figure out how to be solid in who you are - you gotta be happy with yourself before someone else can be happy with you.

   Good luck out there!

7. Please don't post your picture. No jk, Your description doesn't sound bad. I've seen WAY ugly guys with super hot women. Most of those cases however, are because they are either rich, or the girl is so stupid that the guy's cocky attitude somehow blocks her from seeing what his face looks like. Don't ask my why, it's the mystery of ages, but women can smell confidence more than the strongest cologne. My advice to you, would be give up on online dating. That only leads to unnecessary awkwardness and anxiety. Why not try and meet them in public places or at work? That's what works best for me.

   Girls are so vain in my area (Los Angeles), that they definitely look more at style than what's upstairs. If I go out dressed in a way that I know girls are currently into, I'll definitely get looks. Now, people may say you don't want to go out and be "fake" but out here in LA you pretty much have to. So yeah, my advice is get off the online dating scene, and go hit up your local Greek festival or something (almost anywhere with a lot of people is a good place to start) with a wingman/buddy or something. Girls will pay more attention also if you are with a friend than by yourself.

8. Please post your picture so we can see you.
   I do not have IM.
9. While these scores made me feel a little better, I wonder if these votes are real or if women are voting me high out of pity? I can't be certain.

   So I decided to try eHarmony and created a profile. For those that aren't aware, the eHarmony system matches people based on personality tests. The system will periodically send you new "matches" and you can either "close" the match or attempt to communicate. What I'm noticing is that most girls are opting to "close" communication with me after the system matches us. They are "closing" me without any contact between us! They just see my profile & pictures and close.

   So whats the deal here? Do women just find me ugly? I wish I could have a romantic relationship like everyone else and I get really lonely from time to time. My yahoo messenger name is magnificent_bumba, im me if you want to see a pic.

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